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7 Surefire Signs It’s a Tarantino ‘Star Trek’ Sequel

Quentin Tarantino may go where no ex-video store clerk has gone before.

The “Pulp Fiction” auteur is teaming up with J.J. Abrams on a new “Star Trek” feature film. Details are spare at this point, but the announcement rocked geekdom all the same.

QT. Trek. ’nuff said.

Tarantino recently presented his idea for the project to Abrams. And, if all goes well, the Oscar winner could direct the film as well as have a key writing credit.

So what does that mean to the “Star Trek” universe? The third film in the recent reboot, “Star Trek Beyond,” disappointed at the box office. Most of the franchise’s current mojo is concentrated on the streaming series “Star Trek: Discovery.”

RELATED: Top 10 Leadership Lessons from ‘Star Trek’

We still long for the 1982 “Trek” sequel that stands taller than the rest. Can Tarantino change that?

We’ve never had a “Trek” film guided with such a singular presence. Tarantino leaves his mark on any project he touches. Can we expect the following Tarantino trademarks to grace Kirk, Spock and the gang?

Feet … the Final Frontier

Tarantino never met a pair of peds he didn’t crave for a closeup. He sucked Salma Hayek’s toes personally in “From Dusk Till Dawn” and spent a very long time capturing Uma Thurman’s tootsies in the first “Kill Bill.”

Santanico Pandemonium - From Dusk Till Dawn (5/12) Movie CLIP (1996) HD

Here’s betting Zoe Saldana will be getting a pedicure prior to the shoot … just in case.

Set Phasers for Gore

Tarantino isn’t a horror director by trade, but his films wallow in guts all the same. His last film, “The Hateful Eight,” must have gone through endless buckets of faux blood before production wrapped. “Star Trek” films are generally PG or PG:13, so he may push the ratings envelope to ensure his vision shines through. Or maybe he’ll go heavy on the red filter.

Slow Mo Spock and Co.

What’s cooler than Kirk, Spock and McCoy going through one of their bro-tastic conversations? The trio walking and talking in slow motion.

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Tarantino made the tic legendary in his first film, “Reservoir Dogs.” Any chance he doesn’t do the same with the space saga’s heroic trio?

Kirk Cuts a Rug

Tarantino knows the power of a graceful leading man. The director made John Travolta put his dancing shoes back on for “Pulp Fiction.” The results? Pop culture heaven. And we can’t forget the creepy torture mambo from “Reservoir Dogs,” either.

Stuck in the Middle With You - Reservoir Dogs (5/12) Movie CLIP (1992) HD

No doubt he’ll do the same with Chris Pine’s Captain Kirk. The character has always had a thing for the ladies, no matter what color they happened to be. What better way to woo a woman than on the dance floor — even if it’s one concocted on the hologram deck?

Trek Is the new Black

Who likes black and white more than Tarantino? Think the suits worn by the anti-heroes in “Reservoir Dogs,” Jules and Vincent in “Pulp Fiction” and the Crazy 88 clan? What about the black and white sequence from “Kill Bill Vol. 2?”

The Crazy 88s - Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (9/12) Movie CLIP (2003) HD

Here’s betting the Starfleet uniform is about to get a sartorial upgrade, QT style.

Hasbeen Resurrectus

Few directors bring aging stars back to life quite like Tarantino. He did it with John Travolta re: “Pulp Fiction.” He recruited David Carradine for the “Kill Bill” features. “Jackie Brown” gave veteran actor Robert Forster a new career lease.

Who will it be this time?

Captain’s Log Title Cards

We won’t hear Pine’s mellifluous voice detailing the day to day actions of the Starship Enterprise in a Tarantino “Trek.” Instead, we’ll get title cards telling us what’s going on in the conflicted captain’s mind.

4 Comments

  1. Please tell me this is a parody article. Tarantino is only rivaled by Aranofsky in the competition for most overrated hack in Hollywood. I was already worried about what Tarantino would do to Star Trek, but your article only makes my fear more palpable.

  2. “Say Khan again! SAY KHAN AGAIN!”

    All kidding aside, there is a way that a Tarantino-penned Star Trek could work, and that’s if he reins in his worst excesses and focuses on writing snappy dialogue that works in the context of the genre. For example, he wrote the scene in Crimson Tide where two Navy sailors get into a fight about which Silver Surfer was the best one, and Denzel Washington’s character dresses them down for it. That scene worked, because it used some amusing dialogue and a pop culture reference to illustrate that the tension of the overall situation was affecting the men on the submarine and their morale. It made sense, in the context of a naval war thriller.

    The problem is that Tarantino rarely writes anything that disciplined – Weinstein just gave him blank checks and let his ego run wild. Writing in the context of the Star Trek universe might actually help keep those excesses in check and make something memorable.

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