7 Stories ‘Late Show with Stephen Colbert’ Won’t Touch

Stephen Colbert is tan, rested and rarin’ to go back to work.

Which means he’s torching President Donald Trump once more in his opening monologues following his summer break. Yes, the President makes it easy with his broad statements and politically-charged decrees. It also makes “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert” the most predictable hour on television.

Here’s his Wednesday night monologue. More. Of. The. Same.

Take any Trump-related topic and you know precisely what you’ll get. Colbert’s unequivocal condemnation. And, if you’re lucky, he might throw in a joke or two betwixt the rants. That’s when he isn’t making the kind of vulgar attacks on Trump that would have likely gotten him fired had he singled out Trump’s predecessor in that fashion.

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It’s been this exact pattern since Jan. 20. Don’t expect it to change unless “The Late Show with Stephen Colbert’s” ratings droop. So far, that’s not happening. Will that last?

We’ll see.

What we most likely won’t see, though, are the following topics on the CBS show any time soon. Each may matter to ordinary Americans, the kind that watch late night TV for both humor and political satire.

These subjects represent what Colbert and co. would rather avoid: Treating “The Late Show” as a forum for red and blue state viewers.

Now Colbert could always surprise us and tackle one of the following items. Two? Highly unlikely. More than that? A virtual impossibility. Watch and see …

Hillary vs Bernie – The Rematch: We’re learning the woman who didn’t move back into the White House Jan. 20 is still seething over Sen. Bernie Sanders. The Vermont Socialist gave her a harder time than anyone expected but still came up short. She’s now blaming him for kick starting the whole “Crooked Hillary” meme. It’s the kind of political grudge match that could yield any number of punch lines to a fair and balanced stand-up.

Team Obama’s Syria Snafu – It’s safe to say the Obama administration won’t look back on its Syrian policy with pride. It proved disastrous, paving the way for the country’s current refugee crisis. Only a former Obama official tried to sugarcoat the failure. How? By submitting a study to the Holocaust Museum’s Web site suggesting the former president’s hands were tied. Scholars questioned the conclusion and the study got the heave ho.

USA Today Tees Off on Innocent Golfers – If you’re curious why Trump’s “fake media” chants connect, consider this: The USA Today recently outed members of Trump-owned golf clubs. Their crime? A love of the sport, perhaps?

Those ‘Mostly Peaceful’ Antifa Mobs – Even Trevor Noah tackled, at long last, this crazed, violent gaggle of far-left protesters. Noah botched the job, but at the very least he mocked some of their antics before re-targeting Fox News.

Bob Menendez on Trial – The New York Times penned a massive story about the Democrat’s legal woes without mentioning his party. The Gray Lady later updated the story without an ounce of fanfare (or transparency) about the bribery charges the Democrat is facing. It’s a big story that most media outlets are either ignoring or downplaying. If Menendez goes down, it could mean a new Republican in the Senate.

Obama’s Unconstitutional Dreaming: A long time ago, President Barack Obama confessed he couldn’t directly help the children of illegal immigrants in their quest to stay in America. Then he used an executive order to make DACA happen. Now, both one of Obama’s lawyers involved in the matter and Democratic Sen. Dianne Feinstein admit DACA stands on very shake ground.

Where’s That Discrimination Again? –  A new study reveals that only 25 percent of college students report experiencing any kind of discrimination. While any brand of discrimination is wrong, the disparity between different ethnic groups may be surprising to some. Turns out 31 percent of black respondents noted at least one instance of discrimination, while 23 percent of whites said something similar.

UPDATE: Colbert did touch upon Clinton’s book and some of the fallout this week. Of course, the commentary was mild compared to how he treats GOP issues. Colbert also didn’t directly mock her blaming Sen. Sanders for her downfall. Still, the fact that he brought it up at all is surprising. Fellow comic Jimmy Kimmel, an increasingly partisan voice, was much tougher on the former First Lady.

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